


Grasp

by rusticshrubs



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Depressed Keith (Voltron), Hurt Keith (Voltron), Hurt Lance (Voltron), Hurt/Comfort, I mean a LOT, Keith (Voltron) Angst, Lance (Voltron) Angst, Lonely Keith (Voltron), M/M, klance, let them c r y, lots of crying involved
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-24
Updated: 2017-12-24
Packaged: 2019-02-19 10:30:38
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,783
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13121886
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rusticshrubs/pseuds/rusticshrubs
Summary: After a near-death experience, Keith stumbles to one of the sleeping quarters. Unfortunately, he doesn’t realize which room he’s in until a certain red paladin enters.





	Grasp

**Author's Note:**

> ima edit this more later; im on vacation in the airport typing this out! expect a longer ending and a beta! enjoy guys!

 

 

Keith stumbled forward, legs shaking and barely holding up his weight. He gripped the side of the grey walls of the castle, and slowly made his way to his old room. His eyes were heavy and sweat trickled down his neck. He couldn’t tell if the slickness by his eyes was tears, and all of his emotions were merging into one. A messy, loud amalgamate of pain, shock, and exhaustion.

Keith lurched into the wall, holding his stomach while latching onto the door handle of a room. He didn’t care at this point who’s sleeping quarters it was, he just needed to be alone.

You’ve had enough of being alone, though, he thinks.

He knew he was being selfish, hiding away after almost dying from a star-sized explosion, but his arms were giving out as he opened the door. He stepped inside the room and let out a burdened sigh.

Keith slid to the floor and melted like a puddle. He threw his already quivering hands over his eyes and breathed. His intakes of breath got increasingly quicker as he sat there, curled into himself while tears filled his eyes.

He let out a half-choked sob when he finally felt water slide down his red face.

 

  
Crying wasn’t new to Keith, since years in adoption had taken its toll during his early teenage years. He remembered being thrown around from home to home until he, much to his embarrassment, had a breakdown in front of a family he had only just been introduced to. At least they had the decency to take pity on him, but he couldn’t look them in the eyes for weeks.

In the Galaxy Garrison, during finals week, he had been so stressed out he stole the coffee maker from his floor and drank half of the packets there at night. He had been so frenzied he couldn’t sleep, and felt frustrated tears fill his eyes as he worked on projects that were due the next day. Although lethargy was common for Keith, he still had bits of strength left to put effort into school. It still felt like a waste.

It was almost funny, in hindsight, until he remembered getting so built up about his real parents and the frustration that he’d probably never be able to see them in his life. He ranted to Shiro one night after sneaking into his campus floor into his room, and ended up holding back a mess of emotion. He mostly concealed it with anger and irritation, but behind it all was vulnerability and heartbreaking sadness.

Once he left Shiro’s floor, he went to his room and cried. He remembered trying so hard to keep it to himself, and promised to never let out that much information. He was well aware he had trust issues, but couldn’t find it in himself to move past them. He said in good time, he would find someone to confide in completely, someone who would listen to him and keep him company, but it was suffocating waiting for so long.

It had been nineteen years already, and he still had no one.

It had been nineteen years, and he was thrust into space and just nearly died from a supernova-like explosion. His life had gotten so eventful he was barely able to process the fact that he was also an alien.

Allura didn’t make it much better. When she found out, Keith had an idea of what would happen. To his dismay, she ended up hating him.

He kind of did too, when he found out.

It was sort of hypocritical for her, he thought, since she was also an alien. He felt the unfairness of it all and instead of lashing out in anger (which he usually did and regretted later) he separated himself from the group. Betrayl was a familiar feeling.

Of his two options, he would rather choose to be alone than being with people who he couldn’t trust. He had gained consciousness that they were good people, they had good hearts, and they protected the ones they loved. But under it all, he knew that no one could avoid misunderstanding him, in all that he was.

The fact that he had some Galran blood in his veins probably did not ease their suspicions of him. Perhaps they thought he was some sort of monster who couldn’t hold back his anger and fiery tongue. He tried not to lash out at times, but it was difficult.

He had been a star student at the Garrison, and his temperament was what had gotten him kicked out. He recalled an offhand comment by Iverson on the sensitive topic of the Kerberos mission, and his vision snapped.

A week later, bags packed and a furious demeanor, he gladly left. He had indignantly wandered back to his house and stayed there for a long while. It was quiet, and all he’d expected of the desert. Scorching heat during the daytime contrasting to chilly nights.

Since the stars were often visible, Keith found himself laying in the cool sand, staring upward.

Shiro, where are you?

It was a dying question on his lips, and he had never felt more lonely. Solitude was his friend, and often the only companion he had.

But then, with no one but himself out in a shack in the desert, he had slowly gained a need for another living soul next to him. Still, he ended up wandering further, where he knew no one would be. He tried all he could to find any leads on the mission, but it had been fruitless for a while until he had found that cave.

When he first arrived, he had been in awe, so he just sat in the dark cave with the glowing blue symbols. They created a mystic light that reflected off of Keith’s pale skin, and he wanted to blend into the walls, to stop existing. It felt unreal.

And then, they showed up.

After so long, he finally met new people. As a generally antisocial person, he knew he would mess up some part of speaking to them, he would end up pushing them away eventually until they misunderstood him further.

They still wormed their way into his heart.

He would protect them with his life, even if it meant sacrificing his own.

 

 

Victory or death.

Keith felt unkempt tears roll down his face, his head buried in his knees. His Marmora armor felt cold and unforgiving on his body. He wanted to get it off before he faced the others. At least, for what it was worth, his breathing had slowed down.

He had been so terrified of dying, thrusting his plane forward until swerving around a ear-splitting blast that hit the planet. He had been so scared, and yet he did it anyway. In those moments with sweat building on his forehead and hands gripping the controls of the ship, he never wanted to live more. And there he was, flying further into oblivion.

“I almost died,” Keith whispered out, fisting a hand in his disheveled hair. He wrapped his other arm under his legs, feeling the hard material of his armor.

He played with the cloth in his hoodie for a minute, trying to calm himself down.

“I could have died just now.” Keith choked, and more tears came.

It felt like a waterfall, accumulating in his throat and finally the dam breaks, allowing his torment to escape. He was subconsciously aware that it felt free, that it felt okay to let it out, but his mind was still racing from what led him to this dark room in the first place.

The fire, the blast, the racing of his heart as he led the ship toward that planet…  
It was so much.

Suddenly, his sobs caught in his throat as he heard muffled footsteps. They were getting increasingly louder as they echoed down the hall. It sounded like someone was arguing.

It’s three people, but who?

Keith wrapped a hand over his mouth, and strained his ears. The voices got louder, and he pressed his head against the door.

“-could have died because you guys wouldn’t listen to me!”

“Lance, calm down!”

The footsteps slowed a couple meters before reaching where Keith sat. His breath caught in his throat.  
Lance was arguing with them?  
What had happened?

“Shiro, our leader, you know? He’s supposed to hear everyone out!” Lance’s muffled voice was laced with anger.

Keith heard a thump, of what he assumed was Hunk leaning on the wall, sighing. “What matters now is that everyone is okay, thanks to Lotor. Not that I’m a fan of the guy.”

“Yeah, he did kind of save an entire solar system,” Pidge added, sounding resigned.

As soon as Pidge ended her sentence, Keith heard a loud bang on the wall, as if someone pounded their fist into it.

“Shiro wouldn’t listen to me, when I said we should get off the planet. No one listened to me,” Lance said in a low voice.

“Lance-“

“We could’ve died, because none of you would hear me out!”

Is that what happened? Keith thought, and idly noticed his eyes had dried. His face was probably still red, he realized with shame. He was too preoccupied in the conversation on the other side of the door.

It was odd, hearing Lance sound so angry. The former blue paladin usually had a silliness to his anger, comedic-like irritation that Keith often found amusing.

However, after the lion switch, Keith realized there was much more to Lance’s character than he initially thought.

Lance trusted Keith, and vise versa. He had...he...

The metallic click of the intercoms abruptly switched on, interrupting the trio of arguing teenagers. Keith’s thoughts stopped for a moment.

“Paladins, everyone aboard this ship, come to the main control room immediately. This is urgent.”

Allura’s usually composed voice was in a state of shock and insistence. He heard her voice crack at the last word, her accent not as soothing as it usually sounded.

“Oh, quiznack! Is Lotor aboard the ship? Did he get in? I don’t need another life or death situation,” Hunk said loudly, before Pidge interrupted him.

“Hunk, Lance, let’s go! I think Shiro’s already up there.”

Keith heard Pidge jog off toward the direction of the main room. Hunk called after her, and his loud steps faded into taps that echoed down the long hall.

He wondered if he should follow, hesistant after all that had happened. He quickly wiped at his eyes, and stood up, thankful his legs were stable.

How would he face them? Could he brush it all off, like it was a malfunction in his ship, or maybe he had lost consciousness? He could say he didn’t know what happened. Maybe they would believe him, but still…

Keith froze, body going rigid.

He heard quiet sniffles and hitched breaths coming from the hallway.

Was Lance still there?

Keith’s question was soon answered as he heard a string of shaky Spanish curses roll off of the red paladin’s tongue. Lance’s voice was breaking with each breath, Keith could hear.

He heard shuffling, and more soft muffled sobbing.

Keith thought he would be a loud crier, judging by how dramatic he was around others. Something inside him broke as he realized that Lance was alone.

Keith slid down to the floor again, resting his head again on the metal door, staring up at the ceiling.

Why was Lance crying?

Keith was usually good at reading people, but this was different. Lance had always been different. The Cuban teenager had seemed mysterious, in a way.

Ironic, considering Keith was labeled as the “emo loner who never told anyone anything about himself.” He knew, he knew he was. He never denied it, because it was true.

“Quiznack, everyone can probably hear me,” he heard Lance stutter out, a soft murmur.

Keith’s eyes narrowed. No one can hear you except me, genius.

“Get a grip, McClain,” Lance said as he moved his arms to his sides.  
He heard Lance lift himself off of the ground, letting out a deep sigh and wiping his eyes. Then, two feet appeared under the door.

Oh.

Before Keith’s brain could process the fact that this was Lance’s sleeping quarters and he was hiding in it like some kind of creep, the door opened with a swing.

Keith scrambled back, eyes widening as Lance stared down at him in shock, eyes rimmed with red, looking disheveled.

“Keith!?”

The half-Galran lifted his arms up, freezing midair.

“Lance, I…” Keith’s voice started, unsure and panicked. No one could see him like this.

Keith trailed off as he scanned the other boy’s face. He had a couple scratches on his cheek, and he looked unbelievably exhausted.

“Keith, what are you doing here?”  
Said boy looked down guiltily, for reasons unknown.

“I thought this was my room. The lights were off.”

Unanswered questions hung in the air.  
The blue paladin looked around to notice his jacket hanging in the corner of the room. He paused for a beat before chuckling.

“I guess they’re both pretty empty, right?” Lance’s lips had a slight upturn to them now, humor in his voice.

He had just been crying, how did he do it?

“Yeah,” Keith said awkwardly. He moved his feet into a cross-legged position, and continued to stare down at his hands.

“Lance, I-“

“Keith, I-“

Both boys stopped, staring at each other.  
Before Lance could open his mouth again, Keith cut him off.

“Why were you crying, Lance?”  
It was sudden, and he barely realized what he asked before the words came out of his mouth. Keith felt bad.

Lance looked caught red-handed. Keith saw his Adam’s apple bob on his neck, sucking in a breath.

“What?”

“I heard you, you were crying outside the door.”

Lance let out a stuttered “o-oh.” You sure that was me?”

Keith looked at the wall next to him. Anywhere but Lance’s tearstained face.

“I know it was you, Lance. You can’t lie to me.”

Lance laughed, strained and embarrassed, lifting his arms above his head. “It was worth a shot. Are you satisfied?”

Keith finally looked Lance in the eyes. He looked upset again, head tilted in accusation as he stared the raven down.

Keith didn’t know what to say. His voice caught in his stomach, where all of the dread usually accumulated over the years.

Victory or death.

The older teenager stood up, bones creaking as he shuffled toward the door behind the red paladin.

“I-I’ll go. Sorry, Lance-“

Keith looked away from said boy again, too ashamed to stay in his room any longer.

He walked behind Lance before feeling a hand on his shoulder, gently tugging him back.

“Wait, Keith!” The red paladin said, uncontrolled.

Keith turned around to face Lance, tears streaming down his face, shining in the darkness of the room. The soft neon lights near the bed glowed against them. It was quiet.

You could tell him everything, Keith.

Keith’s eyes trailed along Lance’s face. He saw the other teenager’s face morph from shock to sadness.

Trust someone for once in your life. Don’t be so selfish.

He remembered Shiro, disappearing for so long, and then he was alone again.

You’re a terrible leader.

Keith stood up on the top of his shack, staring at the stars. They twinkled in the blackness and he wondered if he would be a star after he died.

Stop crying, stop-

Keith gave in.

 

“I almost died,” he managed to cough out.

In a split second, Lance pushed forward and wrapped his arms around Keith’s torso.

His soft hair pressed against his chest, and he froze for a moment before falling into the hug. He lifted his arms up, holding onto Lance’s back as tears dripped down his face.

“I’m sorry, Keith. I’m so-“ Lance’s voice cracked as he began to cry, head pressed into Keith’s neck. They were both about the same height, Lance being a bit taller so he had to lean down a fraction.

Their shaking breaths were slowing down as they held each other, gripping tighter with each exhale.

“You, you-“ Lance gritted out, “don’t you know how much we care about you?”

Keith did not answer, he only embraced Lance tighter.

He smelled like the ocean.

A refreshing, sweet scent. It was unforgettable. It was like Lance had taken him into his current, pushing him into the tide while the water leaked from his eyes.

Before they knew it, five minutes had passed. No one had come down to get them. Allura was probably angry, but neither of them had the strength to care.

 

 


End file.
